Career Naysayers: 3 Reasons They Criticise Your Goals

What Is a Career Naysayer?

I have seen this more than once and have even been victim to it myself…coming face to face with a naysayer.

Naysayer
Noun
‘a person who criticises, objects and says it cannot be done. Someone who is sceptical of your abilities or possibilities of success’.

There is always someone out there who is a naysayer and will tell you how you are wrong, unable, and incapable or should not follow your career goals and dreams. Sadly, it could be a close family member or friend who give you this negative criticism and lack of support.

It can be very hurtful, demotivating and crushing to have someone show little support or enthusiasm for your passions and career goals. Especially if this person is someone in your immediate circle. It could even get you to start questioning if it is worth pursuing your goals. It may make you questions “what if they are indeed right?”. So is a naysayer correct, are they just protecting you from failure and future heartache or is there a deeper motive behind it?

There are three things to consider when figuring out the motives behind a naysayer:

Projecting

Often, people project onto others. They have their own experiences and feelings and push that upon other people who they believe would experience and feel the same.

For example, if you took an art class and loathed it. It was boring and you were not able to master any technique and therefor your work was looking like something a three year old would create. You may then project onto others by telling them art class is a waste of time and they should not consider pursuing it. But because you had a negative experience, does not mean they would too. However, from your experience, you will advise others against it even if they have a real interest in it.

If you do feel someone is projecting onto you, it is best to find out about their experience, learn from their past and try not to follow in their footsteps. For instance, you want to start an online business, but your uncle who had an online business failed, and tells you it’s a horrible idea and you should not invest any energy into it. Find out where your uncle believes it all went wrong for him. Do your own research and take your time to work out how to overcome those obstacles. His failures should not have to be yours.

Fear

Just because you are told it is not a good idea by a naysayer, it does not necessarily mean that this person thinks you are incapable or wants to see you unhappy. Often, it is the opposite. They worry for you and rather see you in a safe, stable situation then go out of your comfort zone to potentially face a long hard fall. But your comfort zone does not always bring about happiness and fulfilment in life. It is a fact that people who do not follow their dreams, passions and heart are less satisfied and feel unrewarded in their daily living.

So, understand the fear others may face for you and the fears you may face for yourself going towards big goals as natural, but should not stop you. Instead, take the time to research, plan and prepare for all that is required to make the right career changes and be able to reach your goals.

Envy

This is sadly common. Most people are jealous of others’ success and others’ abilities to go after their dreams. It is not an easy feat to see your dreams come to life and many individuals hold back due to fear or larger obstacles in their way. So, these people will do and say anything to try and get you to stay in their zone. If you grow and flourish, it will only make them feel worse about themselves.

Our advice; follow your dreams.

Focus on you! Do not worry about other people’s insecurities. It is their own personal issues they need to overcome and resolve, not yours. You should not limit your growth to sooth other people’s egos.

How to Respond to a Career Naysayer

Overall, it is not easy to block out negative feedback when you are dealing with your personal, close to heart goals and dreams. Especially when you are so excited and hopeful, it hurts when someone comes along and tries to crush it.

What you should do first when you come across a naysayer is to listen; try to understand why they are naysaying. Is it projecting, envy or do they have a point? This is where you need to do further research and find out for yourself if your career goals are logical, make sense and indeed achievable. If they are right, you can alter your goals so that they are logical and still fit in with your vision.

If the person who puts you down is clearly envious or clueless about you and your abilities, you should choose to ignore their words. If people think you cannot do it, that is their thoughts and thoughts are not facts!

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What is a career naysayer?

A career naysayer is someone who often doubts or talks down your career goals. They might be worried about you, judging your plans based on their own experiences or simply not understand what you are trying to do.

Why do some people criticise your career goals?

Sometimes it comes from genuine concern. Other times, it may be based on their own fears, past experiences or ideas about what a successful career should look like. If you are unsure where they are coming from, ask them.

How should I respond when someone criticises my career goals?

Hear them out and ask what is behind their concern. If they raise a fair point, look into it before making any decisions. You can consider what they say without letting them decide what you should do.

When should I take negative career feedback seriously?

Pay attention when someone points out a specific risk, skill gap, money issue or practical problem you have not thought about. Comments like “you will never make it” are not very helpful unless there is a clear reason behind them.

How can I stay confident when others doubt my career plans?

Do your research, make a realistic plan and take it one step at a time. Being prepared and seeing your own progress can help you trust your judgement instead of getting caught up in someone else’s opinion.

Should I stop sharing my career goals with unsupportive people?

You do not need to share every career decision with everyone. It may be better to speak with trusted friends, mentors or career professionals who understand your goals and can give you honest, useful feedback.

Can criticism of my career goals ever be helpful?

Yes, it can. Helpful criticism may point out risks or gaps you need to think about. The difference is that useful feedback gives you something to consider, while unhelpful criticism simply tells you that you cannot do it.

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